On the eve of their birthday, many people feel unwell, get sick with viral infections, they are accompanied by troubles, bad mood, longing, anxiety and even depression. Is this a coincidence or a pattern?
Anastasia Vorona” title=”Anastasia Vorona“/>psychologist, expert in building harmonious relationships
If you feel sad on the eve of your birthday, perhaps it’s not just a bad mood.
Why you can get sick on the eve of the holiday
High expectations
Many people associate birthday with a holiday, gifts, attention and fulfillment of desires. And everyone, whether he likes it or not, thinks about his “perfect” day. About how I would like to celebrate it, what surprises to get. Most often, expectations do not match reality, which spoils the mood, motivation drops, old grievances surface, and stress levels increase. The body weakens, and, as a result: “Hello, illness!”.
Feeling unfulfilled
On a birthday, it is customary to take stock and set new goals. And the greater the gap between expectations and reality, the more disappointment we feel in our lives. After all, everyone wants to realize their potential to the maximum. As a result: stress – weakness – illness.
The situation is quite different for those who somehow consider themselves successful. Such people, as a rule, celebrate the holiday with pleasure, because they feel able to make it exactly the way they want to see it. When the two concepts “I want” and “I can” are joined, the disease does not come.
Sometimes our ideas about our success diverge from reality, not because we have not achieved anything, but because the achievements seem insignificant to us. This phenomenon is called impostor syndrome. How to deal with it, told in the article.
How to stop being ashamed of your success. 4 Ways to Deal with Imposter Syndrome
Lack of energy
It is believed that on our birthday we are given a certain amount of energy for the coming year. Thanks to her, we can fulfill dreams, achieve goals, build relationships with people, monitor our health. It is believed that by the end of the “astrological” year, resources run out, weakness appears and we become more susceptible to negativity. This period is especially difficult for those who are prone to hypochondria, increased anxiety, and perfectionism.
Low self-esteem
On the eve of a birthday, everyone consciously or unconsciously begins summing up the results of the past year. Sometimes disappointment comes and, as a result, a depressive mood with all the ensuing consequences. In addition, special expectations and hopes are placed on the holiday itself: who will come, how to congratulate, whether it will be possible to celebrate as you want.
People with low self-esteem are at risk of morbidity before their birthday: they do not consider themselves worthy of this holiday. And if this is confirmed by something indirectly (for example, no one congratulated), joy is replaced by a feeling of dissatisfaction, a depressed mood, which reduces the protective properties of the body.
How to avoid it
Ksenia Obukhova
certified psychoanalyst
Do not deprive yourself of the holiday and learn to notice the good. Here’s how to do it.
Let go of the old
End your year right: discard everything old that has become obsolete, complete business, repay debts. Pay special attention to debriefing. Remind yourself that this year brought good things, what special events, achievements, victories took place.
Do meditation practices
The technique of keeping a diary will help. Write down everything positive that happened to you during the year and during the last month, even the little things. For example, you have found a new friend, bought a new thing, went on vacation. This is necessary to reprogram your brain and notice the pros, not the cons. Breathing practices and massage can also help reduce anxiety symptoms and help you relax. How to perform breathing exercises correctly, read our previous article.
How to breathe properly to calm down. 3 exercises from the doctor
Make realistic plans without devaluing yourself
This will help you avoid disappointment. If something goes wrong, remember that difficulties are given to us in order to strengthen the spirit and become stronger. Study your mistakes, analyze what they taught you. This way you will start to be kinder to yourself. Look at your failures from a different angle. Give up the desire to always do everything right. Do not forget that your importance is in no way connected with the number of those who congratulate you or come to the holiday.
Try to lead a healthy lifestyle
The wild lifestyle wastes a lot of energy that could be spent on achievements. Therefore, the new year of your life should start right – for example, to improve nutrition, get rid of bad habits, go in for sports.
Do not drown in your sores and work on self-esteem. And then your birthday will not cause horror, but only pleasant emotions. If you cannot do it yourself, do not be afraid to seek help from specialists.
